Those few drops..

She was an insomniac and morning walks were her thing. She could never get enough sleep or a good quality of sleep and after these walks she felt physically and mentally at ease which would help her doze off for some time. She was one complicated teen girl with drama engulfing her from all sides. She was overwhelmed by the smell of fresh, wet mud on which she walked and the rays of the beautiful sunrise that were preceding her every step. It had been raining a few minutes back and she had just missed it.

During these walks she pondered over her every action, her every argument and the mistakes she made. The words she had uttered, she scrutinized each one of them to understand, what was missing and in ethical in her. Getting negative feedback about her behavior and the way she expressed herself was definitely not on her bucket list. But even though she tried to mend the faults in her, people could not see her efforts. All they saw was the negativity in her. Her attempts and struggles to become a better person passed unrecognized.

She had been called naive, selfish, heartless, shameless, useless, and worthless and all the hostile words one could possibly use to depict a person. Going over these words that had been used to describe her, she tried to relate them with situations where she could have actually behaved in this manner to gain these taglines.

This is what she did every morning. She blocked out the world and walked around aimlessly just trying to figure out how to improve herself and her personality. The first impression she had left on everyone was that she was rude and she wanted to change that. But what she failed at was to express herself.

There were so many things that she had failed to communicate which were actually the cause of all the misery in her life.
There were so many emotions that she had hidden within her so that she could prevent others from getting hurt even though it was at the expense of her feelings.
There were things left unsaid and undone which could actually prove that she indeed was the person everyone wanted her to be.

Everyone’s expectations were high but she wanted them to know that at times they too need to understand why she has failed to reach that level of expectancy, instead of just pouncing upon her. Her side of the story should be heard too and not passed on without any recognition.

At that moment she felt a few drops of rain fall on her. Looking up at the cloudy sky she felt that the darkness within her was weeping just like the clouds were shedding their own tears. But they had a soothing effect on her. Her tense brows now relaxed and the crease that had appeared on her forehead had now been smoothed out, he cheeks started to flush and a small smile lingered at the edges of her mouth.

And in those few moments of the first spell of rain, she forgot everything and just enjoyed the beauty of the rains that never failed to calm her down.