...from words

Since I have nothing better to post and I am having this huge reader’s block I decided that I’d update something I had written long back.

My friend and I were playing this game where she would send me a word and we were supposed to write something about that. A short story, a viewpoint, a poem, anything and everything was acceptable. So out of the many rounds that we played, here is the collection of words that I really like and so I’m updating there here and sharing it with you all.

Round Three: Silky

It ignited my bones;

It was like fire to ice.

Sparks erupted in my body and I had no means to extinguish myself.

I was burning but still not charred.
She sat there looking at them laugh, play or giggle.
She longed for that curve that could set everything straight.
It will slowly slither in your body as we speak, and make you just like him.

I was on fire and yet not scarred.

It took one caress of her silky hand to melt me.

Round Five: Alone

Sitting on the swing, she had no one to push her back and forth.

She sat there looking at them play, laugh and giggle.

She saw their lips curl up.
She longed for that curve that could set everything straight.
She looked around her, but she was enveloped by a blanket of air.

She was, Alone.

Round Six: Imagination

He inserted the key into the lock and set it free.

"I've been confined for too long but now it's my time to breathe", she said.

She walked and hopped and let herself go wild.

She came across several ideas but then out them aside.

All she wanted was to fly,

Because after ages

Imagination had been unconfined.

Round Eight: Sun

Her face was shining like glitter, twinkling like the stars.

No, she was not a vampire.

Her curly brown hair looking like a lighter shade than normal, cupped her face.

Her light brown orbs gazed into my eyes as though they know me inside out.

Her whole body was radiating under the light of the sun;

Her presence was basking me like the warmth from the sun.

For me, she was the Sun.

Round Ten: Nyctophilia

She loved the dark.

Loved to walk on paths where her shadow could not be seen.

Loved to walk on paths where her demons were invisible.

Loved to walk on paths where darkness was warmth and the moonlight her shade.

Loved to walk on paths where she could just walk away.

She loved the darkness and the darkness loved her.

She had a love for darkness -Nyctophilia.

Round Eleven: Friendship

"What is friendship?" he asked.

She said "Something that is most painful and magical thing;

Powerful than love.

It is your strength but weakness too.

It completes you but makes you feel lonely too.

It makes you smile, but cry too.

It questions you, but answers you at the same time.

It is the best thing in the world but the worst too.

It is love but hatred too."

"You forgot something," he said, "It is one day with you, the next day with someone else."

Round Thirteen: Dust

It is dust we inhale, dust we exhale;

Dust that we are made of and the dust we will bury into.

There is dust in our mind, dust in her hearts;

It is dust that we think and feel.

Then why do we fear dust?

Dust won't bite us.

Convert you, disintegrate you.

And soon, you'll be lying there;

Indistinguishable grainy gritty,heap of dust.

Round Fifteen: Blade

She missed the chilling warmth of the knife and

The shine that the sharp knife emitted.

She could not get out of her head that flirtatious wink

That sharp end gave her as it reflected the light.

The life pouring out of her with the warm blood

Flowing down her cool skin had become her drug.

People were addicted to the feeling of love, lips and kisses

But her preferences were sharp and painful.

People loved the warmth of the lips whereas

She preferred the cold tips of the knife.

People loved the swollen lips after they had been kissed

But she loved the faint lines on her wrist.

The kiss of the blade was her salvation.

Life of a Young Girl -Part 4.

Slowly she was fading away, disappearing from this world. With each passing moment she was diminishing, curling and retreating into her shell. She was backing away from her problems because no matter how much she tried, she could never find the treasure chest containing all the solutions to her problems.

Optimistic nature had long vanished and pessimism had taken its place.

The hope of being happy had long cleared and the future to remain sad was in view.
The faith in finding success and prosperity had vanished and belief in downfall had been established.

Slowly while she was swimming in the wide ocean, she came upon the thought, what if she swam across the ocean far away floating and washing away with the tide and got lost? What if she the drifted into a dreamless sleep and all she savored was the briny taste of water entering her lung via the mouth and inhaled the brackish essence of the sea water clouding her senses?  What if during the course she became handicapped, numb and lost the perceptibility of her surroundings?

These thoughts were overwhelming and tragic. They were tempting and were magnetic, attracting her, her heart crying out in desperation wanting to be set free like a bird. But she decided to be audacious. She decided to give up on finding the solutions but not on life.

She decided to lead a life where every morning was cloudy.
She decided to lead a life where the ray of hope had been cloaked.
She decided to lead a life where credence has extinguished.
She decided to lead a life where there were shadows of her demons.
A life where she had no answers but just questions.
Not solutions but just problems.

Rhythms of Life

One early morning, when the sun was still hidden behind the fog bank and there was a faint tint of orange and red in the sky, she got up and decided to overwhelm her senses with the beauty of the sound of music and take a walk on the beach. Finally after months she had got time for herself and she was on a vacation; she was away from the hustle bustle of the city, away from the commotion of life, away from pessimist people and now amongst the company of pragmatic ones.

“These days, it’s hard to find people who lead happy lives”, she said to herself.

Popping the earphones, she inhaled and allowed the smell of the brackish water to cloud her thoughts and before she could tune into the song, she heard the cry of the seagulls and the waves crashing against the rocks on the beach. Feeling content after listening to the vibration of nature, she started listening to her play-list which was a mix of fast and slow paced songs, rock and country songs and various other genres.

Listening to music always provided a distraction, it gave her time to let her mind wander and ponder upon various topics that she eluded daily.

“There are various rhythms in life- hot and cold, dark and night, summer and winter, sun and moon; and we should learn to dance to them. We always say that certain lyrics remind us of our situation, it gives insights that there are people who feel the same; there are several tunes in our life. Some are serene and peaceful and some are out of our grasp. We need to learn how to decipher which tune suits us and illustrates us. Life is like music. You can go with the flow and lose yourself in the blaring and thumping of the drums or find yourself ogling at the sound of the guitar, or you can stop and listen to the melody of the violin; it all depends on us which tune we want to dance to and let our feet tap to it; the tune that makes our head bop and soothes our soul”, she thought.

Already sitting on the sand, looking at the uncovered yellow ball of fire shining bright in the sky, she smiled to herself and started nodding her head to the sound of music playing in her earphones.

Those few drops..

She was an insomniac and morning walks were her thing. She could never get enough sleep or a good quality of sleep and after these walks she felt physically and mentally at ease which would help her doze off for some time. She was one complicated teen girl with drama engulfing her from all sides. She was overwhelmed by the smell of fresh, wet mud on which she walked and the rays of the beautiful sunrise that were preceding her every step. It had been raining a few minutes back and she had just missed it.

During these walks she pondered over her every action, her every argument and the mistakes she made. The words she had uttered, she scrutinized each one of them to understand, what was missing and in ethical in her. Getting negative feedback about her behavior and the way she expressed herself was definitely not on her bucket list. But even though she tried to mend the faults in her, people could not see her efforts. All they saw was the negativity in her. Her attempts and struggles to become a better person passed unrecognized.

She had been called naive, selfish, heartless, shameless, useless, and worthless and all the hostile words one could possibly use to depict a person. Going over these words that had been used to describe her, she tried to relate them with situations where she could have actually behaved in this manner to gain these taglines.

This is what she did every morning. She blocked out the world and walked around aimlessly just trying to figure out how to improve herself and her personality. The first impression she had left on everyone was that she was rude and she wanted to change that. But what she failed at was to express herself.

There were so many things that she had failed to communicate which were actually the cause of all the misery in her life.
There were so many emotions that she had hidden within her so that she could prevent others from getting hurt even though it was at the expense of her feelings.
There were things left unsaid and undone which could actually prove that she indeed was the person everyone wanted her to be.

Everyone’s expectations were high but she wanted them to know that at times they too need to understand why she has failed to reach that level of expectancy, instead of just pouncing upon her. Her side of the story should be heard too and not passed on without any recognition.

At that moment she felt a few drops of rain fall on her. Looking up at the cloudy sky she felt that the darkness within her was weeping just like the clouds were shedding their own tears. But they had a soothing effect on her. Her tense brows now relaxed and the crease that had appeared on her forehead had now been smoothed out, he cheeks started to flush and a small smile lingered at the edges of her mouth.

And in those few moments of the first spell of rain, she forgot everything and just enjoyed the beauty of the rains that never failed to calm her down.

Life of a Young Girl -Part 3.

The sky overhead glowed dimly with the twinkling light of the stars.

 The leaves underneath her feet crunched with the pressure of her each in-calculated and aimless footsteps.

The wind howled with the sorrows she carried on her shoulders.
The trees sang softly the song of her beautiful melancholy.
Tonight she had decided to embrace the darkness and dance with her shadows.
She was on a journey of discovering her demons.
She had set out to unravel the mysteries of her life.
She was on a mission; a mission to unshroud the purpose of her life.

The path took a curve and the undergrowth became thick.
She could feel the soft brush of her adrenaline which she was trying to suppress.
As she walked further the darkness just grew.

She knew she was walking right into the trap of the vicious and dexterous shadows.

She knew she was snuggling and cuddling in the mysteries instead of coming from under their cloak.

She was hiding further. But she didn't stop herself.

The thing she had set out to resist was the one which had an invincible control over her.
No matter how much she ran, he came chasing after her.
He always caught up to her.
Each time she thought she had escaped the confines of his arms which were the bars of her prison, she found herself reeling back to him.

Her struggles were all in vain because she was again in the prison of his shadowy, dark tendrils.
Her feelings –traitor.
Her escape –futile.
His charm –overwhelming.
His embrace –welcoming.

Words..

Words are fascinating. They are very powerful because when they are put together in a proper order they form a sentence; a sentence which expresses feelings, which can make a person happy or a simple sentence which can pulverize someone’s life.

These words are treacherous. They feed and seek shelter in our minds and then when they get tired of residing in our head, they want to break free; so they bang against the walls of our minds wanting to be unconfined from their prison. Sometimes our words take over our minds and wherever we go, we can see them come to life, hear them, feel them. Words escape from their containment and ripple through our arms like goose-bumps, urging us to pick up the pen and paint the white paper black. 

Words cut like razors. A small incision can turn into a gaping hole and a small wound can turn into a scar. They are responsible for our survival. One may not mean to say them, but when those harsh words are uttered, the damage inflicted on someone is hard to measure.

They give us the power to criticize someone, to ruin their lives, to demolish their work and hard earned way to success; they slip out of our diabolic tongues even before we realize it and inject venom so poisonous that to find a medicine to heal it, is next to impossible. They guarantee us that they will stay by our sides always but when we need them, they are the first ones to betray us.

Do they have a mind of their own or is it us involuntarily controlling them, is still foreign to me because even when we suppress some of our cruel words by covering and sealing off our mouths, our expressions, eyes and attitude give us away. So basically, our body with our words is traitorous.

They say think before you speak. But if your words have minds are we really thinking?

On Friendship –Part 2.

“I walked away from her. I shattered her already fragile heart. I broke my promise. I walked away. I am to be blamed. I did it.” He murmured.

He couldn't bear to see her cry, he couldn't wait over there and see her demolish right in front of him. He couldn't leave her when he needed her more than she needed him, but he had to; for her and for himself; he had to create this ridge between them.

Without even having a last glimpse at her he walked away taking heavy and big steps to escape the chaos he had created, all the while forcing the tears at the brim of his eyes itching to break free.

When he crushed her heart he heard the clink of something break but he knew that it wasn't her heart that he had heard crush on the floor, but his own that had splintered. He could feel the uneasiness in his stomach he always experienced when he trampled all over her, but this time he completely annihilated her.

This time it was permanent. He did not want to let go, but he wasn't fit for her. Except for sadness and pain he had never given her anything. All he did was brutally and cruelly treat her and never respected her for all she was worth; and when he realized it, it was too late. So he let go.

As he walked away from that unholy site, a part of him longed to hear her desperate voice, heavy and saddened with her tears begging for him to stay, to give each other a chance.

But no such call came.

And so he walked away.

Walked away from all the late night memories.
Walked away from all the tears and laughter.
Walked away from all the hugs and shoulder bumps.
Walked away from all the pain that had been long engraved.
Walked away from all those ‘Mornings’ and ‘Nights.’

He did not look back and she did not call him.

And he walked away.

On Friendship -Part 1.

“You”, he breathed out. And just like that her world shattered. The arms that were out stretched to embrace him fell against her sides, her body sagged and she let out a heavy breath; the edges of her eyes were filled with water and there was a desperate urge to yell which she swallowed.

Forming incoherent words she mumbled, “But..but we were supposed to be forever. How can you leave me?” She could not even believe her own words as she spoke them. The promise they had made to each other was breaking today; the nightmares she had seen were coming to life today; the fear she had buried a while back was re-surfacing today.

“You’re to be blamed. Just you. You’re the problem. You’re the root cause and I’m uprooting you from my life”, said he and just like the fruits on the trees decay and leave a hollow space, the same cavity had now been carved in her heart. She could feel air pass through that hole widening the gash and further deeply engraving the pain. She knew the scar of his harsh words would be engraved on her heart, in her mind forever.

She knew it was too late. Yet she attempted; decided to give a chance and took a leap of faith towards him but she only fell front faced as he stepped back.

This was it. This marked the end. All the thoughts of somehow making the friendship last went out of the window. So she let go, let that tear drop wanting to fall for so long, trickle down her cheek and with a brave gesture ceded parts with a major chunk of her heart that belonged to him.

That part was: Decayed. Rotten. Old. Expired. Shattered. Worthless.

It did not deserve a place with her and so she let go.

Let go of all the late night memories.
Let go of all the tears and laughter.
Let go of all the hugs and shoulder bumps.
Let go of all the pain that had been long engraved.
Let go of all those ‘Mornings’ and ‘Nights.’

He turned and walked away without even having a last glimpse at her.
And she let him go.

Back to Blogging

Hello everyone. It's been a while since I blogged, six months to be precise. All thanks to my strict mother who wanted me to concentrate of studies.

Well Mother, if you're reading this, I'm back to blogging and I'm here to pour my feelings out.
I have so much free time right now that I can finally concentrate on my writing again.
Hopefully over the months when I was on a study vacation, my writing would've improved. Hope that you guys like it.

So, I'll be back with a new post soon.
Till then, Cheers guys!